My 2nd pregnancy was sooo difficult from the start and the birth of Jayden was very stressful. I was so poorly at the time and for a little while after and it all weighed down on my shoulders. I ended up going to the doctors as I was feeling very down and struggling a little bit. I got diagnosed with post natal depression. It really isn't surprising at all to me. I am the kind of person that deals with everything head on whether its good things or bad so when I felt like I did I knew I needed help so I went and got it and didn't bury my head.
So I started the gym around the same time as starting the tablets so it was a double help to my state of mind. It is hard to feel the way I feel when up until the last few years I have always been such a positive person. I HATE being miserable and I HATE being negative. I still have a way to go with getting my positive state of mind back but I am really really trying. I owe it to my hubby and kiddies who have to live with me the poor buggers lol!
I started the gym 2 weeks and 4 days ago. I have always loved going to the gym but I hadn't been for years. I just didn't think I was capable of doing it anymore with my lungs feeling so much worse nowadays. I was so self concious of having coughing fits infront of random people and them thinking I was spreading some nasty disease to them all lol!
I really do believe in everything happens for a reason!! I got Chris to join the gym and the day of his induction he bumped into Laura which is my cousin's best mate since school. I know Laura quite well too. A while ago Jodie had come to see me for a cuppa and she told me that Laura had been diagnosed with MS. This is a girl that did half marathons and was super fit but more importantly the most beautiful person inside and out and it genuinely upset me finding this out. Not cos I felt sorry for her but cos she really really didn't deserve such a crap hand being dealt to her. She is one of the nicest people I have ever met and would do anything for anyone. I wasn't really aware of how MS effects people and what it actually does to someone. It's like with any illness I guess that unless you know someone with it you are ignorant to it to a certain degree.
I will be honest and say that I have never been able to relate to anyone else that has had any illness apart from my fellow CF friends. That is until I started speaking to Laura on a regular basis. We have both found that we have very similar ways of thinking about our illness' and our illness' have more similarities than I would ever have thought in a million years. I cannot explain how much I appreciate having Laura as a friend as she has helped me so much. She helps me feel less alone and definately makes me feel less sorry for myself on occasions!!! We are also the most stubborn people who refuse to let these crappy illness' get the better of us. We may have our down moments but we always come back fighting. I have big respect for you Laura you are an absolute star!!!
Anyway I will get to the point!! Chris bumped into Laura at the gym so I contacted her and asked if I could go with her. We would make a right pair at the gym but at least if people started they wouldn't know which one of us to look at first lol :o) So the next day I had a re-programme and started the gym again. In the mean time we decided to call ourselves the Dream Team and Jodie also decided to come with us. Jodie has diabities so we really do make a funny team! We have such a laugh when we go together it really does make the gym fun.
2 last points I want to talk about...... Firstly is that since I re started the gym I have managed to go from 15 mins to 40 mins exercise. I actually managed to run today which I used to love doing so much. Only for 30 seconds but I DONT CARE I am chuffed I managed to run. Secondly thank you Laura for being a good friend and my inspiration to get off my bum you really have made a difference to me.
Hope you feel better soon Laur love ya xxxx
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